CHAPTER 1.
"I'm so excited to have this opportunity, Silvie." Sabrina grinned between sips of tea. "Full time work, and doing something I love to do. Mr. Caruthers said it’s more than likely that I’ll get more hours to add up to full time.”
Silvie whooshed around the kitchen in her usual early morning flurry to get her chores done before she went to her job at the bakery. "You've worked hard for that position, you deserve it."
Sabrina took the opportunity of Silvie's good mood to tell her about her plans. "But there's more."
Silvie turned to her, a curious peak in one brow. "More you say?"
"I found a great little place for lease, not far from here. I'm thinking of..."
The air left Silvie's lungs in a dramatic puff. "You want to move out?"
"You're married now. You should be allowed to enjoy married life alone with Bailey. You don't need me getting in the way every evening." Sabrina looked up at Silvie. “Now, I know that you’ve said no in the past, but can’t you take a moment to think about it properly?”
Silvie sat at the kitchen table with Sabrina. "How can you possibly afford it? I know you will be earning a full time wage soon, but they don't pay a woman nearly as much as they pay a man, you know. No one does. "
"But I can, I checked what I'll be earning with the full time position."
"Ach, Sabrina, mudder would not think it’s right for you to live alone.” Silvie held her hands in her lap. "You say that Bailey and I need to be alone, but that's not true. You're familye, and we want you here with us.”
Sabrina knew Silvie would do this, say these things, but her mind was made up. "I appreciate that. I really do. But this is something I need to do, something I want to do. I'll make sure Mamm and Dat understand that you did your duty, tried to make me stay but that I refused. Don't worry."
Silvie's cheeks reddened. "Is that what you think, that my protests lie solely in duty? Sabrina, how could you?"
"Nee, of course not, I didn't mean it like that. But Mamm and Dat will insist you stop me, and I know you will feel responsible. You're a good woman, of course, you will. I'm just saying that there is no need to feel that you should make me stay. I want to be by myself."
Silvie leaned across the table and pushed some loose strands of Sabrina's hair back under her prayer kapp. "It's so much more, Sabrina. You're my little schweschder. I've loved having you here. In spite of your drama before the wedding."
Sabrina gave half a smile at her schweschder; she had hoped that Silvie might forget all the things that she said about Bailey before they married.
"I'm going to miss you at the breakfast table." Silvie's eyes glistened with emotion.
Sabrina did not want to upset her sister. Silvie had put up with a lot from her in the past and had been through so much during her young life, so her needs meant a lot to Sabrina. But Sabrina had to live her own life. "I feel like I'm intruding on a familye here, Silvie. I don't feel I'm living in my own life, rather that I'm living in yours."
"Didn't we make you feel welcome?" Silvie’s eyes reddened as if she was going to cry.
"Jah, of course. But you're in love; I feel I'm in the way. You should be alone with Bailey, and I should be elsewhere living my life as I see fit. I'll still come by and visit you both."
Silvie frowned, her mouth drooping and her bottom lip protruding.
Please don't cry. "And I'll still be around when the little bopplis arrive. And let's face it, that will happen a lot quicker if I'm not here making you both feel uncomfortable."
Silvie's mouth upturned before she covered it with her delicate hand. "Ach, Sabrina, you’re awfully crude."
"Nee, just honest. So, I'm leaving then, and you and I are right with it, jah?"
“Let me think on it for a time. You know you’re extra special to Mamm and Dat because they thought that they were through with having bopplis and then you arrived a gut ten years after me. I’m surprised they even let you live with me since they’re too far away to keep a gut eye on you. It’s only because they trust me to do it.”
“I’ll be alright, Silvie.” Sabrina knew that what Silvie said was true, but she would have preferred if she were a little less special in her parents’ eyes. With all the attention came expectation, and pressure to be the perfect dochder.
* * *
Sabrina did not want to hear her boss argue with his son, but her desk was right outside his office, and the walls were thin.
"Trevor, you’ve come again for more money? Yet you've squandered every dime I ever gave you. Why would I feed this need in you? In which way does either of us benefit?"
Trevor snarled, "Well if you will listen to gossip, Father, there’s nothing more to say."
"Gossip? I need only to look at the state of you, smell the whores on your body and the whiskey on your breath. I see nothing for the constant investment I make in you, for the faith that I have shown you. Nothing."
Sabrina winced at the mention of whores, feeling altogether unprepared for such subjects in a place of business or anywhere else in her world.
"It's going to be one of those days is it?" Trevor's voice did not sound in the least confrontational—it rang with boredom. “Should I get on my knees father, make a list of promises I couldn't possibly keep, and confess my sins to my perfect father? It’s not as if you’re perfect. I could speak of Mrs. Wright."
Mr. Caruthers, Sabrina’s boss, huffed in frustration. "Don’t mention her name, do you hear me? And as for having you make promises, that would be pointless and you know it."
Sabrina knew that Mrs. Wright was an Englischer, who often visited the auction house after she’d bought some horses. She wondered what Trevor meant by bringing up Mrs. Wright’s name to his father.
Trevor said, "Excellent, then we can bypass the drama and get down to the writing of checks?"
"What would you live on if I were not the generous father you despise so much?"
Sabrina heard a drawer open and papers rustling.
Mr. Caruthers continued, "What did I do to make you so hateful?"
Trevor yawned loudly enough for the sound to carry through the walls, Sabrina thought, until she peered up at the door and realized it had come ajar.
Sabrina wanted to close the door, but did not want either of them to know she had heard their argument. Instead, she got on with the work in front of her.
"You think I’m hateful? What father wouldn’t want to help his son out? It’s not as if you’re doing something that any proper father wouldn’t. If I had a son, I’d help him out.”
“Well, you don’t have a son, do you? Come to think of it you could be supporting three families on the money I’ve given you over the years.”
“I'm running dreadfully late, could we do this Q&A thing another time?"
Sabrina jumped as she heard something that sounded like Mr. Caruthers slamming his fist onto his desk.
“No, we damn well can't. You have nowhere important to be; that's the point.”
“Now, now, Father, the staff will hear your temper and gossip will spread like wildfire that the great man himself is falling apart. As for having nothing to do, whose fault is that? I keep telling you I'm ready to go when the place is up and ready. I work hard around here and deserve a promotion and a hefty pay raise. If you paid me what I’m worth, I wouldn’t have to keep asking you for money.”
“As if I could trust you to manage anything. Anyway, we may not be opening the other place. Money’s tight at the moment. This is the last dime you’ll get out of me. I’m cutting you off; this is your last check. See how you survive without my constant bailouts. Maybe you could try proving yourself like everyone else has to.”
Trevor spoke through a searing rage. “Like everyone else but one. Let's face it, Father, I was never ever going to live up to the effervescent May, my saintly and ever so saccharine sister.”
Their voices were not raised now, and Sabrina could scarcely hear what they were saying. She moved closer to the wall and pressed her ear firmly against it.
“No, you're wrong. She does prove herself worthy, every day.” Mr. Caruthers’ voice shook with emotion. "Because she appreciates everything given to her, and she puts others first. May doesn't use folk for all she can get, and then behave like a child when things don't go her way. May is more mature than you’ve ever been, even though she’s years younger.”
“There we have it then, you answered your own question."
"What in tarnation are you talking about, Trevor? So you treat me like this because you're jealous, petty, and spoilt? But you were both born equal, Trevor. You were loved the same as children and treated the same. There’s no use talking to you.”
There was a sound like paper being snatched, most likely the check. “I'll take that and leave. You’re old, and soon you’ll be dead and I’ll get everything and I’ll run this place better than you ever did."”
“Well, that’s something I’ve been thinking about too.”
“What do you mean that’s something you’ve been thinking about? You’ve always said you’re going to leave this place to me. I’m the only one who’s truly interested in this business.”
There was a moment of silence. Sabrina stayed perfectly still with her head pressed to the wall as hard as she could.
“Go on. You’re not thinking of changing your will, are you?”
“I don’t want to, Trevor, but I’d like to leave this world with the comfort of knowing my legacy will keep going for generation after generation. I’m trying to build a legacy that will live on. My fear is that you will squander it all away.”
“I won’t squander anything. I’ve just got to sort a few personal financial things out, and I’ll be fine.” There was silence for a time and then Trevor spoke again. “Look at it like this – I’ve got a degree in business and May, well May’s an airhead.”
“May has common sense and a natural flair for business. I put all my eggs in one basket, and that was wrong of me. I should have let May go to college too and not just you.”
“Trust me, Dad," he said with apparent sarcasm on the last word. “You'll
be sorry if you change your will.”
“I’m seriously thinking of it, and I don’t say that to be mean, I say that to wake you up to yourself.”
Sabrina heard Trevor’s footsteps and flew back to her desk.
Sabrina smiled nervously as he stormed past her desk. Trevor’s face was hard, and his eyes blazed straight ahead in a fixed stare.