Chapter 1.
“Why did you leave me?”
Emma Kurtzler stared at the body of her late husband. Of course, she didn't expect him to respond, but she felt as if she deserved some kind of answer. Why did he have to die when everything in her life was just the way she had always dreamed it would be?
The rumbling of muffled conversations from the crowd in the next room made Emma aware that her time with Levi was drawing to a close. As was custom in Emma’s Amish community, the body laid in the familye haus before being taken to the cemetery.
Emma smoothed Levi’s hair back with two fingers and touched his hands, which were placed across his chest. “Oh, Levi, you don’t even look like you anymore.” It was true, the body that lay before her was Levi, but there was a different feeling about him, as if he were someone else. In a way, she wanted to keep him there, right in the house with her forever, but she couldn’t – that would be weird.
The noises from the other room distracted her once more. Levi would soon have to go to the cemetery, his body’s final resting place. She touched her stomach lightly, knowing there was a chance that there might be a little boppli inside. If there were, then she would have a piece of Levi with her forever; she would have someone to love and wouldn’t be alone.
“Emma, are you ready for everyone to come in now?”
Emma looked up to see the solidly built, dark-haired Wil, who had been Levi’s best friend and constant companion. Levi and Wil were complete opposites, which was most likely the very thing that had drawn them together. Levi had been stable and dependable, whereas Wil was flighty, full of fancy notions and always thinking of grand ideas for new gadgets. Sometimes Emma found Wil funny, at other times tiresome, but on this day she didn't know what she would have done without him.
“Just one more minute, Wil. Just one more minute.”
Wil bowed his head and left the room. Emma heard him say something to the crowd in the living room and a hush fell.
“I have to go now. I guess Gott wanted you home for some reason.” A tear trickled down her cheek and dropped onto the black fabric of Levi’s suit. She had made sure that he was dressed in the same suit that he had worn on their wedding day.
With the back of her hand, she wiped the damp from her cheek. “I guess I won’t be far behind you. We all have to go sometime, don’t we?” At that moment, Emma wished that she had been the one to die. If Gott wanted one of them home, couldn’t it have been her? Why did He have to take Levi?
Emma put her fingers to her lips and then placed them on Levi’s forehead before turning and opening the door for the waiting group of relatives and friends. Some folk smiled at Emma as they filed past to see Levi, while others offered their condolences. After a few minutes in the crowded room her head began to swim.
“You okay, Emma?”
Emma knew it was Wil beside her. “I need some air.”
He ushered her through the crowd and out into the open for some fresh air. Once outside, Emma felt much better. She took a little walk along the row of buggies and drew in a deep breath. As she exhaled, she caught sight of her reflection in the window of a buggy. At first, she hardly recognized herself; she seemed much smaller and thinner, her cheeks sunken from too much crying. She studied her reflection and adjusted her white starched prayer kapp, reminding herself to put on her black over-bonnet before she headed to the cemetery.
Emma swung around to talk to Wil, who was still standing close by. “Denke, Wil, for helping me these last few days. I really don’t know what I would’ve done without you, with my parents not being able to make it here and everything.”
“Emma, you don’t have to thank me. Levi and I were like bruders, so I guess that makes you like my schweschder.” He laughed as he tried to make light of the situation. When Emma remained silent, with no hint of a smile on her face, he added, “I’d do anything for you, Emma, remember that. If you need anything, please ask me, whatever it is.”
“Okay, denke.”
“I mean it, Emma. Look at me.”
Emma looked into his deep brown eyes and noticed for the first time how beautiful they were. Not that she would ever – or could ever – be interested in another mann; certainly not the very flighty and unstable Wil. She continued to look at him, but he didn't speak. “Jah, Wil?”
“I want you to know you can rely on me for anything. House repairs, buggy repairs, anything at all – I’ll be there.”
Emma dragged her eyes away from him. “Denke. I will remember that.” It warmed her heart that she lived within such a close-knit community of caring people and wouldn't have to be alone.
Wil looked over her shoulder. “Don’t look now, but Elsa-May and Ettie are headed this way.”
Elsa-May and Ettie were two elderly sisters, both widows. Up until a few days ago, Emma had not had anything in common with the funny old ladies. Now, she knew the heartache they must have gone through when they lost their husbands. The bonds of loss united them.
“There you are, dear. How are you feeling?” Ettie was the more gentle, soft-spoken of the two, whereas her schweschder, Elsa-May, was loud and to the point.
Before Emma had a chance to open her mouth, Elsa-May said, “Oh, Ettie, how do you think she’d be feeling?”
Ettie wrung her hands. “Oh dear – I’m sorry, Emma. I’m always saying the wrong thing.”
Emma smiled at Ettie and put a comforting hand on her shoulder. “Nee. That’s fine. I appreciate your kindness.” Emma guessed the two of them to be in their seventies, or perhaps even their eighties.
There were two other widows in the community, Silvie and Maureen, who were much younger. Even though she wasn’t close to many people, Maureen was Emma’s dearest friend. She was the kind of person that people liked instantly from the moment they saw her. Maureen was a large woman with a most generous smile, one couldn’t help but smile back at her. Her face was round and glowed with an inner radiance, and she had a delightful small gap between her two front teeth. Maureen had been a widow for some time, but her husband had been unwell for many years so his death had not been unexpected.
Like Maureen and Silvie, Emma was childless unless Gott showed His kindness – she wouldn't be sure for another couple of weeks.
Emma couldn’t even count all the buggies that made up the procession to the cemetery.
Standing by the graveside, Emma looked around her. Everyone was dressed in black. Never in her wildest dreams did she think she would have been widowed so young. She and Levi had barely started their lives together.
The bishop walked forward and cleared his throat. Emma had respectfully asked him to be brief in what he said at the graveside. She didn't think she could take a long, drawn-out sermon and the bishop was extremely fond of long, drawn-out sermons. He had agreed to keep it short.
He preached the usual funeral jargon that Emma had heard so many times before. We all return to the dust of the ground – not very cheerful. Neither was life being likened to a vapor that is here one minute and gone the next. Emma closed her eyes and replaced the bishop’s words with Levi’s smiling face, happy to be home with the Lord at last; that made Emma feel better. She mentally blocked out the words about the ‘dust of the fields’ and the ‘vapor.’
It was after Levi had been placed in the ground and everyone was returning to their buggies that Wil whispered to Emma, “Who is that Englischer standing over there? Do you know him?”
She followed Wil’s gaze. Emma had not even noticed the Englischer. She stared at the stranger and he stared back before walking toward her. “I don’t know him at all, but he’s coming this way.”
“Looks like you’ll soon find out,” Wil said.
“Good morning, Mrs. Kurtzler.”
Emma nodded hello to the stout man with thinning gray hair. By the look of his suit and the shine on his fine leather shoes, Emma presumed him to be quite wealthy.
“It’s likely not a good time, but I’m here to make you an offer for your land,” the stranger said.
Wil put his strong arm between the two of them and turned Emma away from the man. “She’ll not talk of business today, or of anything like that. Good day to you.” Wil steered Emma away.
She glanced over her shoulder at the man to see that he was still looking at her with desperation written all over his face. Emma had just inherited Levi’s prime parcel of farming land. Levi had leased it out to Henry Pluver, an Amish man who also leased other Amish farms, including Wil’s.
Once they were a distance away, Wil moved his arm from Emma’s back.
“I wonder why he wants the land,” Emma mused as she looked around for the Pluver family. Surely they would be at the funeral. She caught sight of the three of them standing together – Mr. and Mrs. Pluver and their only son, Bob. The Pluver family kept to themselves, but Mrs. Pluver seemed a most unhappy woman and their son never spoke to anyone. Bob worked with his father and, as far as Emma knew, he had no friends.
Wil shook his head. “Vultures, nothing but vultures. I’m sorry, Emma. I should have gone over and asked him what he was doing here or who he was.”
“You weren’t to know. It’s not unusual to have Englischers at one of our funerals. Levi’s boss and the men he worked with are all here; for all you knew, he could’ve been one of them.” Levi had worked for one of the new high-rise building construction companies. Emma had been told that Levi had refused the mandatory safety harness, and a sudden downpour of rain caused him to slip on his footings. Emma was shocked when she’d learned that he had refused the safety harness, as Levi was normally such a stickler for rules.
Wil whispered to Emma, “Is that Levi’s boss walking over now?”
Emma turned to face Mr. Weeks.
“I’m so sorry, Emma. Is there anything at all I can do?”
Emma shook her head and Wil butted in, saying, “The community looks after its own.”
Emma frowned at Wil, which caused him to look at the ground and take a slight step back. Emma knew that he was only being protective, but Mr. Weeks was just being nice and she considered Wil’s actions to be quite rude.
“Do you mind if I visit you at some point in the future?” Mr. Weeks’ eyes flickered nervously toward Wil. “To make sure you’re okay?”
Normally Emma would have laughed and said she would be fine, but with Wil’s outburst just moments before, she felt she had to be extra polite to make up for his rudeness. “That would be lovely. I’ll look forward to it.”
Mr. Weeks was an older man and Emma guessed that he would have been dashingly handsome in his day. He had good bone structure with dark hair that was graying slightly at the temples. He reached into the breast pocket of his black suit and pulled out a business card. “Here’s my number if you should have need of anything before then.”
Emma took his card and watched Mr. Weeks walk away. There was something nice and old-worldly about the man.
“It appears I have my work cut out for me.”
Emma had forgotten that Wil was standing behind her. She turned and looked into his face. “What?”
“Watching out for you. You haven’t even left the graveside and already you have vultures after your farm and elderly men out to capture your heart.”
By the way his jaw clenched, Emma knew that Wil was being serious for once. “Wil, you don’t have to watch out for me. I’m a grown woman. Besides, I don’t think that Mr. Weeks is that old, and he’s rather charming.” Emma loved to tease Wil whenever she could.
“Emma, Levi’s only been gone five minutes – how could you even look at another man?”
Her light-hearted moment was gone, replaced with anger at Wil’s response. Surely he should have known she was joking. She wanted to yell at him or tell him to mind his business. Of course she was not entertaining the slightest notion of another man in her life, but she was far too tired to explain herself; besides, why should she? “Wil, I love you like a bruder, but today I just can’t deal with your nonsense.” Emma looked at Wil’s waiting buggy and then glanced back at Levi’s grave. “Just take me home.”
As Wil pulled the buggy away from the cemetery, the man, who had asked to buy her land, leaped toward the horse and grabbed the reins. The horse had no choice but to come to a complete halt.
“Get away from there, man! What are you doing?” Wil leaped out of the buggy and towered over the man, who meekly offered up his calling card.
“I forgot to give this to the lady. My phone number, in case she changes her mind about selling.” He looked directly at Emma. “I’m offering top dollar. I’ll pay more than anyone else.”
Wil snatched the card from his hands. “Don’t ever jump out at another buggy like that again. Do you hear me?”
The man nodded, but it didn't stop him from repeating, “I’ll pay more than anyone else.” The man backed away, stepping in front of another buggy before scampering off the road.
Emma put her hand over her mouth and stifled a giggle at the man’s antics.
“That man is a vulture.” Wil threw himself back heavily into the buggy seat and handed her the man’s card. “Here, not that you’ll ever need it.”
“Why not?” She took the card and ran her eyes over the gold script writing.
Wil drove the horse forward and shot a glance at Emma. “You’d never sell, would you?”
“I haven’t thought about it.” It was true; she hadn’t thought about it. There didn’t seem to be any reason to sell. Even without Levi’s weekly wage coming in, the monthly lease from Henry Pluver was enough to live on. She wouldn't have to go out and work. Gott had blessed her in that way – she knew that both Silvie and Maureen had been forced to find work when they lost their husbands.
“I don’t want you to leave Levi’s farm, but let me know if you ever want to sell and I’ll buy it from you.”
Emma smiled politely as she mumbled, “Jah.” She didn’t know if Wil could raise enough money to buy the farm. Wil fancied himself as an entrepreneur, with his hands in lots of businesses, but Levi had told her in confidence that they never made him any money. Wil owned the farm next to Emma, but just like Levi had, he leased it out to Henry Pluver to raise wheat crops while he chased income from other sources.
