CHAPTER 1.
Iris slipped quietly onto the porch, tiptoeing to the kitchen window. Pressing her ear to the cool glass, she strained to catch her parents' conversation.
Their voices floated through a small crack in the window, just enough for her to piece together what they were saying. She held her breath, willing them to agree to her plan. They had to understand. They just had to.
The first voice she heard was her mothers. “Carter, she’s been talking about this since she was a little girl. It’s not some whim. Iris feels a strong pull toward the community, and you know that.”
Her father’s sigh was audible, followed by the sound of his chair scraping as he shifted. “I’m not saying it’s a whim. But staying with your mother all summer? That’s a big step for someone who’s only eighteen. And isn’t Ada’s nephew still staying with Wilma?”
“Mathew’s there, but he’ll be gone soon.”
Her father hesitated. “But what if she decides not to come back? Have you thought about that? She’s eighteen and that’s old enough to do what she wants.”
“I know.”
“Well, prepare yourself.”
There was a brief silence before her mother replied. “If we don’t let her go now, she might make a rash decision later. You know how she is when she feels stifled.”
Iris’s jaw dropped. Stifled? When had she ever acted rashly?
“I just think it’s too soon,” her father continued. “She needs to think about her future, about what she’s really giving up if she chooses to join the Amish community. She hasn’t experienced enough of life to know. Perhaps if we hadn’t home schooled her she would’ve experienced more…”
“More of what?” Florence asked.
“More of what life could offer her.”
Iris knew exactly what she wanted. The Amish way of life had fascinated her since childhood, ever since those long summer days spent with her grandmother, watching her work in the garden, bake bread, and quilt by lamplight.
The simplicity, the quiet faith, the closeness of the community—it had all called to her in a way she couldn’t explain. And now that she was old enough to make choices about her life, she wanted the chance to explore that pull.
Her mother’s voice softened, but it was clear she was holding back emotion. “I left the community for you. I left everything I knew to be with you because I loved you, and I don’t regret it. But this is different. Iris isn’t talking about leaving us. She’s not running away, she’s searching for something. She’s always been different from Chess, more serious, more thoughtful.”
Iris bit her lip at the mention of her annoying younger brother. Chess never missed an opportunity to tease her about her interest in the Amish way of life. For him, the idea of living without technology, without freedom to do as he pleased, was a joke. He made fun of her for wanting something so ‘old-fashioned,’ but Iris didn’t care. Chess didn’t understand what it felt like to be torn between two worlds.
Her father’s voice broke through her thoughts. “I get it, Florence. I really do. But she’s eighteen. That’s too young to be thinking about commitment to anything, let alone a life like that. And if she stays… well, what then? She could marry young, start a family. Is that what we want for her? For her to lose out on the things she could experience, the things she could become?”
Florence’s voice was quieter. “What if that is what she wants? We can’t push her into a life that’s not hers, just because it’s what we chose for ourselves. Iris is her own person.”
There was a silence that stretched too long, and Iris could imagine her father rubbing the back of his neck, staring at the kitchen table like it held all the answers. She’d seen that look before when he had been deep in thought.
“I just want her to be sure,” Carter finally said. “If she goes to live with your mother this summer, I want to know she’s making this decision with her eyes open.”
“She’s had her eyes open for years,” Florence said gently. “She thinks she knows what it means to be Amish, but maybe when she stays with Wilma she’ll see it’s not what she thought..”
“I see what you mean. At the moment she’s looking through rose-colored glasses”
“And It’s just for the summer unless she wants to come home sooner.”
Iris’s heart pounded. Just a summer. That’s all she was asking for—a chance to live with her grandmother, to see if the life she’d dreamed of was truly the life she wanted. She didn’t know what the future held, but she knew she needed to explore this part of herself before it slipped away forever.
The door behind her creaked open, and Iris jumped, spinning around to see Chess grinning at her from the doorway.
“Eavesdropping again, Iris? Geez, you’re worse than a nosy old lady,” he teased, his voice dripping with mockery. “What are they saying? Gonna send you off to live in some dusty old house with no Wi-Fi?”
Iris glared at him, her heart still racing from being caught. “Mind your business, Chess. You wouldn’t understand, and Grandma’s house is clean, not dusty. I might tell her you said that.”
He stepped closer, his smirk widening. “Oh, I understand. You want to go churn butter and wear those weird dresses all summer. What a blast.”
She pushed past him into the house, her temper flaring. “You don’t get it because you don’t care about anything but your stupid video games and your dumb friends.”
Chess snorted, following her down the hallway. “Yeah, because living without electricity sounds like so much fun. You’re gonna hate it. You’ll be back in a week. No, in a day.”
Iris spun around to face him. “I won’t, Chess. I’m not like you. I don’t need all this noise and distraction. I need to figure out who I am, and if that means spending the summer with Grandma, then that’s exactly what I’m going to do.”
Her brother blinked, taken aback by her determination, but quickly recovered with a teasing grin. “Okay, fine. But when you come back bored out of your mind, don’t say I didn’t warn you.”
Ignoring him, Iris made her way to her room, where the quiet could finally wrap around her. She leaned against the door, closing her eyes. Her parents were still debating her future in the kitchen, but Iris knew her choice was made. This summer with Grandma could be the key to finding the path her heart had always been drawn to.
